It might sound a little bit crazy, some people could even think it's absurd, but the person who made me see that psychology was my calling was Kurt Cobain. I was fascinated by his music and everything that has to do with him when I was fourteen years old. From that fascination, I realized my goal was to get to understand, in the best way possible, the human mind.
As years went by, I graduated from college with a psychology degree in 2013. I always knew that I wanted to dedicate myself to clinical psychology and I've got my own consultation room now where I work with children, teens and adults.
My job fulfills me but it can be a really lonely job. It's all about you and your patient, no one else, and in some way, you really end up missing working with other professionals and sharing different points of view.
I spent part of my last year in college doing a assignment on Kurt Cobain for my psychopathology class. After I finished it though, I felt like it wasn't the end for me, like I wasn't done with the whole thing and some day I would get back to it. And I was right. I returned to it when 'Kurt Cobain: Montage of Heck' by Bret Morgen came out in 2015. After I watched it, I knew I had to continue with that project because it was real fulfillment for me and felt like my actual vocation.
My psychopathology teacher encouraged me to start a dissertation about BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) based on Kurt Cobain, and as I did, I didn't see the family or professional support I was expecting. Most of them said that I couldn't just change my professional path because I had a consultation room and in their minds I would have to give that up to do this as well. They thought it was impossible to do both things.
Sometimes I thought they were right but luckily, I have three amazing women in my life that motivated me since the beginning and have always been by my side. They're my teacher, my mum and my friend Ainhoa, who is actually a psychologist too.
Their strength and perseverance have been essential to me, and thanks to that, I've been combining my job and my Kurt Cobain work for the last five months. It has not been easy, I don't have that much free time and some days I feel like the stress is too much, but then I think about how much I want this to work and I'm full of energy again.
I know I have some difficult years ahead, but all the effort and stress will be worth it. I love working with patients and helping them overcome their problems, but my dream is to get my Kurt Cobain essay to reach as many people as possible.
I think hard work is always rewarded and we should never stop following our dreams, as hard as the way to finally get them can be. I'm extremely lucky because I have some of the most amazing women supporting me day by day and I hope you all find the support that reminds you that you can do the same.