BANKS is an artist I’ve had my eye on for quite a while now, mostly after hearing her song, “Waiting Game” back in 2014. I was instantly attracted to the dark, almost whimsical tone and found myself quickly falling in love with all of her songs. I also found myself falling for her openness, her honesty, and her fierceness after “getting to know her” through her videos and interviews on the internet. Here at LFC, it should come as no surprise that we appreciate women like BANKS – those who embody the idea of self-acceptance, dedication, and empowerment.
Now, I find myself more deeply connecting with the vulnerable lyrics in her newest album, The Altar. I get the sense that she is speaking about her personal development over the past few years into someone who is stronger and more confident. I relate to this, as lately I feel like I’ve been able to better accept my inner demons much more than I was able to before. I’ve always considered myself a strong individual – but I recognize now that there have been many times in the past where I’ve actually been pretty weak… referring mostly to past relationships. I often doubted the way others felt about me, which made me feel like I wasn’t worthy. This isn’t something I’m ashamed of or something I regret, as I think it’s incredibly important to experience those feelings. I now identify them, put them in a little box, and throw it behind me. Her song “Weaker Girl” from her newest album is so badass. It’s almost like she wrote it while sitting inside of my brain. My potential used to constantly feel squashed, and I let that happen. I’ve recognized the type of person that I want to align myself with, and that’s someone who is going to honor my strength. Someone who isn’t only able to handle a weaker girl.
After hearing BANKS speak about personal experiences and her mental health in recent interviews, I feel as if we think very similarly. We are open books. We aren’t afraid to express ourselves and to share things that may actually be pretty intimate. We’re confident but we’re also scared. I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression for several years, but I have it handled for the most part. I do get scared that I will struggle with this forever, but allowing myself to accept that I just might has actually helped. I’ve accepted that my mind can be very destructive sometimes, and I just need to let it pass – it never stays long. It’s like really shitty food poisoning... you just gotta get it out of your system.
BANKS speaks about how she thinks society today wants to make women feel small, and how it makes you feel like you can’t be aggressive, or fierce, or authoritative. I have to say that I agree with her. I don’t think society is entirely this way, but I definitely think that these restrictions are prevalent. She has been able to channel and defy these through her music. I think that I have been able to defy these restrictions in my presence and in my personal relationships. I admire BANKS’ unapologetic feminism with hints of boldness and ferocity. I’d like the same to be said about me someday. Write that on my grave.
-Jenna Rosenberg, recipient of an award in 4th grade for creative writing.
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